There are many funny things pilots say to passengers on flights. Although they often take everyone by surprise, they will go down in history as some of the more humorous things about flying.
Flying can be stressful, so funny announcements can take a lot of tension out of the experience. Many of these funny announcements are memorable because they involve unusual circumstances.
Reading about these announcements will give you a greater appreciation for pilots who can make light of things. When you think about how stressful flights can be for many, accounts of these types of announcements will help you appreciate the humor.
Table of Contents
Why Do Pilots Make Announcements Anyway?
Although it’s industry standard for airline pilots to introduce themselves, the content of the announcements is primarily personal preference. The broad discretion that pilots have often given rise to some of the humor that we hear about on flights.
Airline pilots can earn high salaries, sometimes they can be highly-paid comedians too as you’ll read below! By the way, if you want to land your dream aviation job, reviewing common interview questions for pilots is key to standing out.
Many pilots veer away from specifically mentioning anything about possible turbulence at the beginning of a flight. Pilots are acutely aware of how nervous many passengers are about flying and may not want to worsen things.
If the weather may lead to turbulent conditions, pilots may emphasize the importance of seatbelts. Passenger safety is a significant priority for pilots, and it’s customary for a captain to alert the passengers to anything that could impact their well-being.
No matter the type of plane, Pilots will also usually alert passengers to mechanical or other issues potentially causing delays. Happy passengers are more likely to repeat passengers/
Poking Fun at the Competitors
Pilots love poking fun at their counterparts from other airlines. It’s all in good fun, of course, but it shows how competitive the airline industry is.
A pilot’s affiliation with an airline is a significant source of pride. However, that doesn’t mean that pride has to be expressed only in serious ways by any means.
Beware the Bogeyman
An announcement on one flight announced that the flights were being dimmed for takeoff. Passengers were informed that if they were afraid of the dark or the bogeyman, there was no need to worry because the bogeyman only flew with their competitor, American Airlines.
If you want to make sure passengers choose your airline, there’s no better way than to make sure everything thinks there’s a monster lurking on your competitors’ flights. This is an unconventional selling point like no other!
Thank You for Choosing Us
A pilot on a Southwest flight thanked the passengers for choosing their airline. This pilot later went on to say that if there were any problems, they should remember they were flying with Delta.
Bringing the competitor into the mix is a great way to lighten up the tension of a flight. As we say in a previous account, the other airline always makes a convenient bogeyman in more than one way.
Being Taken In
A Delta Business Express announcement started off by thanking passengers for flying with them. The pilot would go on to say that they hoped the passengers enjoyed giving the airline their business as much as the airline enjoyed taking them for a ride.
This play on words shows the pilot’s good humor in dealing with the passengers. The pilot’s comment probably put a few smiles on the departing passengers’ faces.
No Smoking in the Bathroom
An announcement on a Southwest flight included a reminder that no smoking was allowed, not even in the bathrooms. Passengers were reminded of what the fine amount was and that if they had that type of money, they’d be on a United flight instead.
Smoking is not okay on commercial flights, and staff often have to get creative to get that point across. A reminder that they could be flying with a competitor is one way to get the point across.
Wild Rides
Some of the funniest announcements have involved pilots making comments about a rough flight or landing. Humor can help lighten up these circumstances that certainly cause a lot of stress.
With as many as 55% of airline passengers finding some aspect of flying stressful, it’s easy to appreciate pilots lightening things up. We might face turbulence in the air or a rough landing, but pilots that can make light of things make everything easier.
Whoa!
One of the most humorous pilot announcements many passengers remember happened during a landing at Ronald Reagan Airport. The pilot, referring to the plane as “big fella,” told it “Whoa!”
Anyone who’s flown often enough has experienced a rocky landing at some point. When the pilot can joke about it, though, you know you’re in safe, capable hands.
Small Children
Another humorous take on a turbulent ride came from a pilot announcement. Passengers sitting next to a child or another adult acting like a child were admonished to put on their own masks first.
We’ve all been on flights with passengers who get nervous over turbulence or maybe been one of those passengers ourselves. Pilots are able to add some humor to a tumultuous time to hopefully keep passengers a little bit calmer.
A Rough Landing
After a plane made a rough landing, the pilot was heard commenting on how rough the landing was. The pilot joked that since everyone survived, they should keep any promises made during the rough landing.
Anyone who flies enough has probably on through a landing so rough survival seemed questionable. If we made promises because survival seemed unlikely, what better reminder is there to keep them than out having survived?
Things That Go Bump
A bumpy landing prompted an announcement that neither the pilot nor the co-pilot were to blame. In a play on words, the pilot blamed the rough landing on the asphalt.
Taking advantage of the word asphalt rhyming with fault may seem like a corny joke. However, this wordplay probably made a scary moment feel a lot less intense.
More Bumpy Landings
An incident involving a bumping landing poked fun at the pilot. Passengers were asked to stay seated as the pilot, nicknamed “Captain Kangaroo,” bounced the plane back to the terminal.
One thing that makes a difficult time on a flight easier to get through is when a pilot doesn’t take themselves too seriously. A pilot who can find humor in their or a colleague’s flying abilities probably keeps a cool head most of the time.
Hitting the Destination
One flight featured a particularly heavy landing that left some passengers a bit shaken. The pilot then made an announcement letting passengers know that if they weren’t already aware, they had hit their destination.
Plays on words can always provide some needed levity in difficult flight situations. Although everyone was undoubtedly aware of the arrival, this lighthearted comment was probably very appreciated by everyone.
Pressurized Tube
A pilot announcement at U.S. Airways started off by thanking the passengers for flying. The pilot then went on to remind the passengers to remember the airline the next time they had the urge to blast through the sky in a pressurized tube.
This announcement puts the idea of flying in an interesting new perspective. Although the pilot’s description of the flight was accurate, it shows that we often don’t think of everything involved when we fly.
A Coffee Scare
A flight from New York to Los Angeles had some unintentional hilarity when the pilot announced after reaching cruising altitude. After a startled shout, the captain came back to announce that a flight attendant had accidentally spilled hot coffee on his lap.
This incident was rumored to have caused some comments from passengers about how badly they were startled. One passenger commented that everyone should see what the back of his pants looked like after hearing the pilot yelling.
Timely Arrivals or Not
Some of the worst stress that comes with flying happens because of delays. Flights that are late can really interfere with our plans and put a damper on what should be an exciting trip.
Sometimes it might seem like a flight arriving on time is nothing short of a miracle. With flights often being delayed, it’s no surprise that pilots like to poke fun at their schedules.
Calling It Even
On one flight, a pilot announced they had arrived ten minutes early. This announcement was followed up with an admonition that they’d “call it even” the next time a flight was two or three hours late.
Delayed flights are one of the biggest nuisances that commercial flyers must contend with. Since this is an aggravation we’ll all deal with at some point, why not see some humor in it?
A Long Evening
An Alaska Airlines flight to San Francisco started off traditionally enough, greeting and welcoming passengers. The pilot remarked that passengers were in the right place if going to San Francisco and in for a long night if they were not.
Hopefully, everyone who boards a flight fully intends to go to the destination. However, if not, this would present an interesting situation from a humor standpoint.
Willing to Ask for Directions
One flight featured a pilot who introduced herself as Amanda Smith. Captain Smith later went on to remind the passengers that if she got lost, she would have no problem asking for directions.
Men’s unwillingness to ask directions is legendary, according to many travelers. This female pilot’s announcement helps give her a bit of distinction among her peers.
A Musical Interlude
One Southwest flight featured a pilot breaking into a song to “Auld Lang Syne.” This tune admonished passengers to forget other airlines and remember that Southwest got them to their destination on time.
The rivalry between airlines provides no end of amusement, especially for pilots. One of the most common ways that this rivalry plays out is by implying that the other airlines don’t get their passengers where they need to be.
The Airport Tour
One flight had taxied for a long time, a situation that passengers often find frustrating. The pilot, being humorous, pointed out a terminal they had passed before and hoped the passengers had enjoyed the airport tour.
Spending more time than expected taxiing because of weather or other delays has plagued more than one flight. Pilots often try to break up the tension in such situations by seeing the humor instead of only the inconvenience involved.
The Shortcut
On a flight, the pilot announced the expected three-hour flight time. This pilot announced knowing a shortcut, so hopefully, the flight would be early.
Although three hours is a short flight, it might seem longer to anyone who hates flying. Pilots making such jokes know how well they might relive the tension of flying for some of these passengers.
Fooled Again?
Many of the funny things pilots have said would only fool the most gullible. However, some of these jokes pilots have made could make people think twice just the same.
Airlines work hard to earn customer loyalty. When a pilot knows how to use humor to their advantage, passengers are sure to remember their flight for all the right reasons.
Cleaning Recruits
A pilot decided to announce that they were recruiting people to clean the plane. Would-be volunteers were asked to stand up before the plane stopped.
Of course, we all know that planes get cleaned whether any of us would do the job. This pilot was most likely thinking of a creative way to keep people sitting until the aircraft had stopped.
Inexperienced Pilot?
A pilot on a Southwest flight to Denver welcomed the passengers aboard. Next, the pilot announced takeoff as soon as they had a chance to read through the flight manual!
When you’re on a commercial flight, you know you’re not in the hands of a flight newbie. However, self-deprecating humor is always good for a few laughs when your flight experiences delays.
Just Being Honest!
A pilot on a Southwest Airlines flight announced that the destination was fifty degrees, with broken clouds that they would try to fix. The pilot closed by letting the passengers know that nobody loved them or their money more than Southwest.
Two-punch jokes are among some of the best that you’ll hear. How else could you manage to make timely remarks about the weather and money so easily?
Challenged to a Race?
A pilot commented during a flight that if passengers looked to the right, they would see another flight racing them. This pilot’s next comment was to say that the Fasten Seatbelt sign was back on because stuff was about to get real.
We know that the planes appearing to be in a race was likely only in appearance. However, the seeming competition against the other plane likely brought some excitement to the flight.
FAQs
What do pilots say in their announcements?
Passengers are asked to fasten their seatbelts, as well as secure their luggage in the overhead bins or under the seats. There is also a request for seats and table trays to be in upright positions.
Pilots will also ask passengers to turn off their electronic devices. These devices include cell phones and laptops.
How do pilots usually greet passengers?
Pilots will customarily greet passengers with a welcome that mentions the airline and the flight number. Welcoming the passengers aboard is a type of greeting common to pilots and flight crew.
Do pilots appreciate it when passengers applaud at landing?
Pilots usually dislike people clapping when a plane lands. Clapping, in fact, often ranks as one of the types of passenger behavior that airline professionals hate the most.
A common complaint from pilots about clapping is the passengers not being able to fully appreciate what is involved in a landing. As one pilot indicated, pilots have their own criteria they use to evaluate their landing quality that passengers cannot appreciate.
What does a pilot say at a flight’s beginning?
A typical exchange would involve a welcome and a mention of the flight number. Pilots will introduce themselves, as well as their co-pilots.
This introduction will also usually mention the flight duration and the estimated arrival time. There may also be a reference to the weather.
Final Thoughts
There are many funny things pilots have announced to passengers. Although truly hilarious announcements might be rare, funny announcements can add a lot of fun to flights.